There’s a bitter-sweetness to being back in a place you haven’t been in some time. Emotions flood back in, what you felt in that snapshot of time, the joys, the dreams, and the struggles that you seemingly left in that place.
A couple weekends ago, I found myself back down where my old office was. The first business I ever owned, the commute I made daily for a year. For a moment I was back in time feeling that sense of accomplishment, the girl running a business like she dreamed, running full speed ahead with responsibility and networking meetings. I remembered how important I felt. A snapshot of that year that began just 5 years ago that ended four years ago this month. I remembered the struggle, the obstacles I faced, but the big dreams and how I felt took me back in a bigger way.
Before I knew it, A in the backseat said “Mama…” in anticipation for another snack, and I looked up in my rear view mirror and there I was in reality. With a different dream and a different responsibility with circumstances much different than I dreamed they once would be. I always built my business dream around having children, that’s not the difference, the here and now is. Everything is different, a good different.
I’m different than that girl 4 years ago that closed her business.
And in that snippet of time it felt good to be back there, just for a second but that view in my rear-view, my sweet girl looking at me with her big brown eyes, calling me Mama, this is by far is better than that old snippet of time I learned so much from. This life I’m living, is exactly where I’m meant to be.