But to be honest, I would do it again I could but totally differently.
I would put more heart, more of my heart into my wedding.
I gave my heart to Ryan, sure, but looking back I didn’t have my whole heart in that wedding. All I wanted to do was be married because I felt like we were practically married already – nothing would change.
Ryan wanted us to write my own vows, I was a brat about it and didn’t want to spill my heart. 2 of the 4 bridesmaids I couldn’t have cared less about, but I had spaces I thought I should fill and I don’t talk to them anymore. Ryan is the same was with his groomsmen.
I didn’t have that deep appreciation of the magnitude of that wedding and of marriage.
Every time I think about it, I wish I could go back in time, and do it again. But I can’t. And I know there is a deep appreciation I have gained within the last year, that has a bigger magnitude than my first four and a half years with Ryan.
There is a deeper love and appreciation for him, and marriage than ever before.
So, the lesson I have learned is to bask in the love and appreciation that I hold so very dear to my heart – and one day, I’ll do it all over again, renewing my vows to this amazing man I married in 2009, and do it right and share the beauty, love and appreciation for him in front of everyone unlike before, and have those that mean the most to us there.
Until then, I’m going to embrace, and appreciate how blessed I am.
It is easy to get caught up in a wedding.
But the best and truest “marriage” is in the sharing of hearts of two people in love. And the ones that understand that are truly blessed.
This is a beautiful post. Reminds me to really give it my all when my time comes to get married. 🙂
http://wonderwomanrises.blogspot.com
After the first couple of sentences I was getting ready to urge you to renew your vows but then I read that you are planning to do it anyway. Please keep in mind, Kristina, that what you and Ryan have is very rare these days at least in my experience. It doesn’t matter all that much how this union was formed. What matters is all that you can make of it now and in the future.
What woman wouldn’t want to redo their wedding? I should’ve gone to the JP and spent the $ on Thailand than on the awkwardness that was that day.
I’m not a big lover of formal weddings. Mine was more like an informal party with just close friends. You know how wonderful my marriage was. I renewed my vows on our 10th anniversary. It meant more to me than our wedding day ever did. This is a beautiful post and I hope you will always be this happy. Hugs my sweet friend!
The longer I’m married the more I know that the Wedding Day is NOT the marriage. Two different entities entirely. Enjoy the marriage…sounds like a beautiful one!
Hugs~
my wedding went by like a blur. i remember thinking that i’d like to have stopped to enjoy it a bit more…
Hi Kristina. I was going to say exactly the same as Shady, that you can always renew your vows at some time, but then you said that you would probably do that anyway. You will probably find that that will mean more to you than the actual wedding itself!