I don’t think I could have ever dreamed up the reality of this family of ours. We dreamt of the days we’d be parents. but never could I have imagined the incredible journey it would take us on. The little unique personalities of each one of our children, the chaos, the good, the bad. The way Ryan loves us. These four are my favorite people. I know I’m incredibly blessed and I also know the reality is that sometimes I take that for granted.
Priorities get skewed, patience becomes short, and my desire for more joy than struggle in our days isn’t always a reality. I know this is how it is for everyone; none of us have all of our junk together or run a perfect home – I get it.
But there’s a sobering reality that it can all be changed in a matter of moments. There no bigger heart dropping, gut wrenching reality check than the truth that “tomorrow isn’t promised” isn’t a cliché saying, it’s the bitter truth. Anything outside of today is a blessing. I’ve watched the rug swept out from too many others to be in denial about this. God willing that won’t ever be our story but I’ll be damned if it doesn’t shift your perspective a bit and make you want to be more intentional about your days.
I want to make sure I cultivate a consistent home of joy and laughter. I want to create an absolute sense of intention and security. I want to know at the end of the day that all four of these people know without a single doubt how much I love them and there’s not a single thing I’d put before them.
Here’s a little real talk for you. I’m sitting here in front of my computer listening to the background noise of my kids laughing with their daddy. This week has kind of felt like a lot, if I’m being honest. The kiddos have been extra rebellious, things have been off in a number of ways, and I’ve been watching the daughter of an online connection fight for her life. A situation that hits too close to home with a little girl so close in age to mine. That kind of stuff wrecks me. It’s part of being an empath, part of being a mother, part being a human.
Here I sit taking a “break” from parenting to work on our big picture goal and dream after being a bit edgy after a long day, emotional heaviness – and in walks Ryan with this. A reminder that life can be tough, we’re in it together, we aren’t each other’s enemy, and everything feels a little bit lighter because he’s by my side.
The quote in the background of our office says “this is your dream and you’re prepared to fight for it. I see you.” – Lindsay Teague Moreno. Unplanned to have it in the photo but incredibly fitting all at the same time.