Joyfully Smitten

Living Life wth Full Hearts and Messy Hands. Encouraging Moms to get hands on with their children and embrace life right where they are.

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Knowing My Boundaries

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Midweek last week a business connection turned friend called me to see if I would be interested in a potential new business client. I was thrilled, referrals are the biggest compliment and that’s where I get most of my freelance work. She have me a small idea of what the gal was looking for and asked if I thought it might be something I would be interested in talking more about if she passed my name along. I gave her the go ahead.

I waited for the woman to make the initial contact and she did the next day but during that twenty hour time lapse I really had a heavy heart about things and felt compelled to be very upfront with her about what my priorities are and what I was willing to take on. In my response to her I told her that my daughter who is a toddler is very busy and that I veer from extra heavy workloads so she can be my priority. I also told her I’m very efficient in nap times and evenings. Then proceeded with the experience I have like she asked. I ended the email with an offer to speak further and if she didn’t feel like I was a good fit I would be willing to point her in the direction of others I would recommend.

I never heard back. *cue the crickets*

After not hearing back I started second guessing how upfront I was in the email. I started feeling like I let my friend down that referred her to me. But when I really thought about it – my heart was content with the honesty I put out there because it was the truth.

I have learned what I can handle and what I can’t while putting A first. I’ve had days where other things have taken my main focus and it leaves me feeling guilty and my kiddo feeling irritated and frustrated. It doesn’t work for either of us when I put too much on my plate.

I once again deleted twitter off my phone again because it’s like a force field that sucks me in and I open it and browse to pass time. I don’t like that. I don’t like the feeling I’m left with when my time is sucked away.

I’m learning what I can handle and I can’t.

I’m learning what makes me feel drained vs what makes me feel full and I’m adjusting as needed.

I’m boundaries that I need to set and it feels so, so good.

  • Jennifer Abbenhaus

    Trust yourself! Discovering what works for you and sticking by it is the best way to be available to others. At the end of the day, it’s your day and you have to live in it.

  • I can completely relate to this! Sometimes I feel awful for being upfront about what I can and cannot do, but when it all comes down to it, it’s better to be honest and not get stuck in a situation where you feel in over your head. And it’s better to be honest and keep yourself sane. I feel like this is still a learning process for me as well, but I’m getting better at it. It’s definitely a thing that you figure out by trial and error, but eventually I think we’ll both figure it out! 🙂

  • Domestic Bella

    It is so hard to balance motherhood and work. I think we will always be searching for the so-called perfect balance. Good for you for being so cognizant of what you and your daughter need.

  • Pingback: How Saying NO to Others is Saying YES to Myself()

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